A Santa Clarita relationship coach is offering tips on how to cultivate what you want in your life, from career to finances to romance and more.
“All of this stuff can get to a point of where we’re just so confused and we feel stagnant,” said Jessica Hartley, founder of the Legendary Love Program. “It can get hard when we don’t have a focus, a direction, guidance.”
Hartley first advised viewing these various components of life as energy, and then recognizing that the way this energy shows up in your life will be a direct reflection of your own internal energy.
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“If I want the doors to open up, … if I want my life to come into balance, then I’ve got to focus on this, on the energy that I have control over, and that is what is inside of my own domain,” Hartley said. “Everything will react to our energy.”
In order to improve your own energy, Hartley recommends approaching life with the following four “rules of thumb” in mind:
- If you’re in desperate need of something, you’re actually blocking it and keeping it away from you.
- If you’re judging something about yourself or someone else, or pushing back against something, you will get more of what you don’t want.
- If there is too much chaos in your life that is stopping you from being peaceful and present, you may get what you’re looking for, but it will be fleeting.
- When we try to control something or own it, it will get stuck instead of growing and moving forward.
“All four of those are really key things to remember as we’re moving through life,” Hartley said. “These things are the things that people do and why they find themselves stuck, stagnant, not moving forward, having things they don’t want and not being able to create or cultivate what they want. They’re doing one or more of those four things, so then we’ve got to do the opposite.”
To Hartley, the opposite of these rules of thumb is to clear the “clutter” in your life — physically, mentally and emotionally.
Physically, this can mean getting rid of material clutter in your house, keeping your environment clean and organized, and utilizing techniques such as feng shui when arranging your space, according to Hartley.
Mental clutter can be cleared by daily meditation, which reinforces the practice of taking control of your thoughts rather than being consumed by the endless, and often negative, thoughts of everyday life, Hartley said.
A professional like Hartley can not only help you with these two elements, but also with clearing emotional clutter by working on deep healing of painful points in your experience, and teaching you how to practice daily self-reflection in an effort to make amends where need be, allow self forgiveness and let go of judgement of yourself and others, Hartley continued.
“The key here is not so much about being absolutely successful at whatever it is that you’re doing,” she explained. “All you’ve got to do is start showing some sort of forward movement, action in one specific, small baby step towards that direction and then calling it a win, meaning feel good about what you did and start to have gratitude and good feeling.”
Ed. Note: This article is a KHTS Community Spotlight based on the latest “Thriving Relationships” with Jessica Hartley, a Santa Clarita relationship coach.
Jessica Hartley is a Santa Clarita relationship coach and the founder of the Legendary Love Program, which provides the necessary structure to introduce powerful changes in your relationship with or without the direct participation of both partners. Hartley uses her 10 years of experience to coach couples on how to save their marriage from divorce and learn to thrive in deep connection and strong, lasting love. The relationship coach in Santa Clarita is the host of “Thriving Relationships with Jessica Hartley” every Thursday at 12 p.m. on KHTS Radio.
The Legendary Love Program
Jessica Hartley, Santa Clarita Relationship Coach, Relationship Coach Santa Clarita, Legendary Love Program, Santa Clarita Relationship Counselor, Relationship Counselor Santa Clarita